Most Embarrassing Moments

Today I updated my resume. No, I did not toil on my professional resume. I am referring to my resume of most embarrassing moments. Undoubtedly, my resume of most embarrassing moments is quite full already. But, it is always nice to keep things current.

Many of the incidents on that resume are falls of various sorts. One such fall happened during my second race as pro in Oceanside, CA in 1998. The race took place at the pier with a very long run in to the water. I bolted when the gun fired and ran hard to establish a good position before we hit the water. All of the sudden, I tripped.  I was sent flying through the air very ungracefully. Just in case anybody in the crowd missed my acrobatics, the announcer shouted, “There’s a woman down!”

I got back up and finished the race with dignity (I was third). I thought nothing else of the fall until the next morning. The front page San Diego Union’s sports section featured a photo which captured the very moment I was hurtling through the air. There are 25 women horizontal and one woman exactly parallel to the ground.

Another bit on my resume of most embarrassing moments was in college. I was rushing to join some friends at the pool to hang out. I threw on my two piece swim suit and a pair of shorts. When I got to the pool, I took off my shorts only to find out I had nothing on underneath. Yikes.

And that brings me to today, the day I unintentionally added my resume of most embarrassing moments.

Let me set the scene.

The background: I went for a run this morning with Diesel.

The time:  8:45 am (i.e. rush hour).

The place: The intersection of Valmont and Foothills Parkway (i.e. very busy).

The scenario: I was waiting patiently for the light to change, with Diesel standing at my side. There were a lot of cars at the various points of the intersection.

The Moment: The light turned green so I began running through the intersection. Midway through, a motorcycle went by and gunned the engine. Diesel jumped in fright and moved from my side to directly in front of me. I too was jarred by the sound and was a little off balance. I tripped over Diesel and suddenly, I went splat onto the pavement. I was sprawled out in the middle of the road, slightly confused and extremely mortified. I stood up, walked to the other side of road and assessed the damage. My left knee and elbow were instantly black, blue and yellow and scraped. Diesel was not harmed. (Note: Aside from a little bruising, including my ego, I am fine).

The grievance: At least fifty people witnessed my fall and not a single person asked if I was ok. Wow. Talk about apathy.

The aftermath: I still had to get home, about two miles away. I started running, very gingerly at first. Diesel must have known something was wrong. Usually he runs beside me or behind me, but now, he was running in front, pulling me back to the house.

The moral: If you fall and nobody sees you fall then you didn’t really fall so try to fall in private.