My last post and many of the posts preceding it lauded exercise. In order to restore some balance to the universe, or at least to the blogosphere, I have come up with some things I find objectionable about swimming, biking and running.
1. Jumping into the pool. No matter the air temperature or the water temperature it is always a shock to the system. I stick in my big toe, I look at the water, I stand on the deck, I finally dive in.
2. The chlorine smell. Even after a hot shower with a healthy dose of soap and copious amounts of lotion, I sweat chlorine.
3. Feet. Ever since my high school days I have been mildly repulsed by the thought of people’s bare feet. Perhaps it is because my own feet are less than perfect (although, when I get pedicures they always insist they have seen worse).
4. Suits that wear out. Many of the new materials last longer, but they have almost no elasticity and the straps dig into your shoulders. The typical Lycra suits have much more give, but within a week the butt is baggy and it drags when you push off the wall.
5. Lane racers. This most commonly occurs when doing a workout during open swim times (as opposed to Masters workouts). I am in the middle of a set and a swimmer in another lane pushes off the wall at the same time and sprints all out for a 25 and then rests for a while, and does this repeatedly until they just give up and get out.
1. Saddle sores and other such maladies. The best chamois coupled with special creams do not repel this cycling affliction. Ouch.
2. Road moguls. Riding on the aerobars for long periods of time is bound to create pressure spots. Bumpy roads exacerbate this problem. If you are suffering from saddle sores, road moguls are truly your enemy.
3. Clingons. It happens everywhere. You are riding along minding your own business and you pass a rider or three and they hop on your wheel. How is this socially acceptable?
4. Flat tires. Flats interrupt rides in so many ways. I am always in a hurry to fix the problem, which makes it take even longer to change. It is much harder to get a tire back on when you are standing on the side of the road with your flat materials strewn about. I like to count the people that ask if I need help and compare that to the number of people that ride by and look the other way.
5. Bike upkeep. Bikes have a lot of parts that need care and attention. There are the mechanical elements, cables, pulleys and nooks and crannies that attract grime. All must be tended to on a regular basis – you do not want to get stuck 50 miles from home due to a major technical failure.
1. Canted roads. I run on one side of the road and it is slanted to the left. I run on the other side and it slopes right. The only solution is to run down the middle. This really irritates the drivers, though.
2. Blisters. The running version of saddle sores.
3. If you get tired on a run and have to walk it takes a really long time to get home (or, even worse, the finish line of a race).
4. The easiest run day is still harder than the easiest bike or swim day.
5. Increased GI motility. Enough said.
What are some of the things that you dislike about swimming, biking and running?